It’s Never Too Late
And it’s just as well, because I’m actually writing this on Day FIVE! 🙁
I’ve only actually missed one day because up until now I’ve been posting about the previous day, but however you cut it I didn’t keep to my commitment to post every day. And I feel really shitty about that.
I do honestly believe that’s it’s never too late – as long as you’re breathing and thinking. My mother took her first plane flight when she was 88 years old. But that was also her ONLY flight. The time left to me – you – us – to actually ENJOY the life we want, to live it fully, is decreasing with every year. And every day we don’t do our soul work, the work that’s really important to us, is another day lost.
Let me be clear: I make a “comfortable” living doing work that I enjoy but which isn’t my TRUE CALLING, my passion, the work I feel driven to do.
But precisely because I’m “comfortable”, I’ve never quite had the courage to put myself right OUT THERE and say “this is me, this is what I need to do for ME, whether anyone else likes it or not!”
Instead I’ve done the busy work, pushed what’s really important to me aside, in fact come up with some pretty amazing ways and creative ways to AVOID doing what’s really important and distract myself from it to the extent of not even being aware that I WAS distracting myself.
Because … what if “they” (that’s YOU) didn’t like it? What if they said “yeah, very nice Isobel but you’re nothing special”? Or even worse, were completely indifferent to me? (Haters don’t worry me, being ignored or dismissed does – or DID)
So here I am at 63, living a pretty good but not absolutely fantastic life, knowing that if I were to die tomorrow or even this year, that I would have failed to reach my potential because I was too afraid to stand up and BE the woman I’ve always known deep inside that I was meant to be.
Knowing that I would have wasted my life.
And that feeling becomes stronger with every year I live.
So yes, it’s never too late to start believing in yourself – but you have to do it sometime.
It’s never too late to be the person you’ve always been inside – but you have to start sometime.
And for me, sometime kept getting pushed back further and further, by about 40 years if I’m honest. So although I’m expecting to live a lot longer, based on my genes (my parents were in their late 80s/early 90s when they died) and my new lifestyle, even I have to admit at some point that I’m not actually immortal! Or at least this body isn’t.
What took me off-course yesterday? I just wrote out a long explanation and deleted it, because it was irrelevant. It doesn’t MATTER what distracted me because there’s always something that I can use as an excuse! Either I’m serious about keeping my promise to myself or I’m not.
Yesterday I broke my promise. I didn’t post, as I’d promised you (and me) that I would. Today I’m back posting and I’m at least proud of that because in the past I would just have abandoned the whole idea and gone on to another shiny object.
How do you feel about the promises and commitments you make to yourself. Are they non-negotiables for you, or do you not take them that seriously? I’d really love to know 🙂
What kind of day are you going to create?